So, this does not really fall under a new for the day. But it is cute and it is a new experience none the less.
I was at my friends house and I was watching these two five year old girls and a three year old getting drinks for themselves. They all went to the fridge. They all had the same options. They all chose for themselves. The three year old picked a juice box. The first five year old chose a juice box but then noticed the other 5 year old has a can of Ginger ale. So she put her juice box back and got another can of Ginger ale out of the fridge.
As the three year old drank and the five year olds filled their cups instead of drinking out of the can, they discussed if the three year old was allowed to have Ginger ale. The two five year olds where very concerned to make sure that they did not do anything that the three year old's mother would disapprove of. Very conscious of them I must add.
So this debate of can she or can't she continues between the five year olds. The three year old is extremely happy with her juice box and is drinking away while they discuss her all around her.
The first five year old has decided that the three year old is too young. We were much older when we could drink Ginger ale.
The second five year old pipes up with, "I was five when I started ginger ale." She is so the addict in the making! Of course I wanted to point out to her that she is still five. But because her birthday is in 3 and a half months she is more 6 than she is 5 in her mind!
I just loved how she thinks. You have to be old enough to experience things. You have to watch out for those around you so that they do not experience things to soon. You have to inspire the desire to want to have things in their proper time. And you have to learn the patience to stick it out until the time comes.
So, I can say that my new for the day is learning from a 5 year old. (of course that happens all the time for me with the circle of friends I hang out with!) But it was a new lesson and that is all that matters.
Monday, March 29, 2010
Fried Green Tomatoes and other passing ideas!
I had so many first’s today that I will have to put up multiple posts.
My first one happened in Wally World. I don’t know if it’s because I am about to turn 40. Or if I am really desperate. Or if I have just given up all reason and have decided to go with all of my natural impulses. That last thought is a little scary-even for me!
Well, today at Wally World I spotted a very nice looking creature. I have run into them all around town and we’ve even joked about stocking each other. But, shy as I am…I have done nothing. So as we both finish our shopping, and they go one way and I go another I am saddened by my lack of courage to step out of my comfort zone and ask them out.
So, as I get into my car, and pause to let a car go by me…It’s them. In the car in front of me. It’s fate. I must do something. Ask them out. Ask them if their married. Just do something. Of course this is all running thru my mind as we are driving down the busiest street we have in town. I am watching every move they make inside the car. And yet, I’m not sure that they have even seen me. We stop at a light. Do I get out and ask to go get coffee? No, I sit still. We come to another light. I could just say something nice about the car! But I say nothing.
And then it hits me, “Fried Green Tomatoes.” I have awesome insurance. I can run into them and get a date or at least a longer conversation then just Hi and Bye, preferably both. I am actually considering it. There is something drastically wrong with my brain. As I finish my debate in my head I notice the car in front of me has their blinker on. This is not the way I need to turn. This is not the way to coffee. This is not the way into my future. I could hit them. Just a little nudge. Just a small tap. The light is going change.
I do nothing. But, at the last minute, I noticed that they looked up into their rearview mirror. It’s now or never. My hands come of my wheel. My brain stops controlling my actions. So, I have my windows down and my hands up and I am shouting Good Bye at the top of my lungs.
Nothing! I think I might have gotten a small wave and a nod. But I will never know, because the next time we pass each other, my head will be down and I will play dumb and pretend to not see them.
I do have to say it was fun dreaming for just a moment. Who knows, they could have been the one. Or they could have been the one that would have totally destroyed my life. Either way the moment has passed and life continues. I will have more opportunities for firsts tomorrow!
My first one happened in Wally World. I don’t know if it’s because I am about to turn 40. Or if I am really desperate. Or if I have just given up all reason and have decided to go with all of my natural impulses. That last thought is a little scary-even for me!
Well, today at Wally World I spotted a very nice looking creature. I have run into them all around town and we’ve even joked about stocking each other. But, shy as I am…I have done nothing. So as we both finish our shopping, and they go one way and I go another I am saddened by my lack of courage to step out of my comfort zone and ask them out.
So, as I get into my car, and pause to let a car go by me…It’s them. In the car in front of me. It’s fate. I must do something. Ask them out. Ask them if their married. Just do something. Of course this is all running thru my mind as we are driving down the busiest street we have in town. I am watching every move they make inside the car. And yet, I’m not sure that they have even seen me. We stop at a light. Do I get out and ask to go get coffee? No, I sit still. We come to another light. I could just say something nice about the car! But I say nothing.
And then it hits me, “Fried Green Tomatoes.” I have awesome insurance. I can run into them and get a date or at least a longer conversation then just Hi and Bye, preferably both. I am actually considering it. There is something drastically wrong with my brain. As I finish my debate in my head I notice the car in front of me has their blinker on. This is not the way I need to turn. This is not the way to coffee. This is not the way into my future. I could hit them. Just a little nudge. Just a small tap. The light is going change.
I do nothing. But, at the last minute, I noticed that they looked up into their rearview mirror. It’s now or never. My hands come of my wheel. My brain stops controlling my actions. So, I have my windows down and my hands up and I am shouting Good Bye at the top of my lungs.
Nothing! I think I might have gotten a small wave and a nod. But I will never know, because the next time we pass each other, my head will be down and I will play dumb and pretend to not see them.
I do have to say it was fun dreaming for just a moment. Who knows, they could have been the one. Or they could have been the one that would have totally destroyed my life. Either way the moment has passed and life continues. I will have more opportunities for firsts tomorrow!
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Head Butting
OK,I did not do this, but I witnessed it. And since I am pretty sure that no one else has ever witnessed this I am going to count it as my new experience.
I watched a 63 year old woman Head Butt a twenty something woman.
I was in my water aerobics class on Friday and we started out just like any other Friday. All the lovely old Bettys and me. We are just getting started when in comes this woman in her twenties. She is dressed in an Olympic type swimsuit, with goggles, fins, hair cap and her own splash board. She is a professional. She is here to work out.
I should mention that up until this moment the lovely ladies around me have been yakking and having fun and not really 'working out.' Don't get me wrong, they are here to exercise, just sometimes it is a tie between their mouths and legs on which one got the harder workout! And they know it!
But all mouths stopped as this woman entered the pool. She did not enter into the "Lap" lane. She did not enter into the area that was intended for serious swimmers. She jumped right in to "Their" territory and started her laps. Full force, perfect form and much attitude was performed by this woman.
One stroke, two strokes, three strokes. All hell broke out!
"Do you see her?"
"Who does she think she is?"
"What right does she have?"
"She is in our Territory!"
"This is our space, does she not see that we are exercising here?"
"She has to go!"
I watch as these beautiful, peaceful sages start to ignite. War is brewing and if I was the twenty something woman I would be scared.
This woman just keeps swimming. The sages have hollered at her. The sages have yelled at the 19 year old life guard to do something. The sages have started to swarm.
One particular sages, who happens to be 63, and has figured out that you don't get anything in life by staying safe, decides to take things in her own hands.
First she tries talking to the woman loudly. The woman keeps swimming. Then the sage taps her on the shoulder as she swims by. The woman pauses, says "I was told I can swim here." And continues to keep swimming.
Now you must realizes that there are about 20 silver haired beauties circling, one instructor, one lifeguard, one trainer, one trainee, a father and daughter team, and me in the pool also. We are all watching this twenty year old blow this sage off.
The next thing I know, the sage has stepped forcefully in front of the swimmer, planted her feet securely, and sticks out her belly! The timing was flawless. The twenty something swimmer swam directly into the belly of this woman head first. Direct impact!
The swimmer paused. The swimmer looked around. The swimmer shook it off. The swimmer kept swimming!
Awe...pure Awe. That is all I can say. I am in awe that someone could be that disrespectful to another person. I am also totally in awe that this 63 year old sage is not totally damaged.
The 19 year old finally decides that he should step in and has to tap the swimmer twice before he can get her to stop, but he finally gets her to go to the "lap" lane.
The whole rest of the class is spent talking about the gull of the swimmer and the endurance of our sages. They inform me that this happens all the time and "they" just have to set them straight!
All I have to say is that I am glad that I am in the class and not against it!
I watched a 63 year old woman Head Butt a twenty something woman.
I was in my water aerobics class on Friday and we started out just like any other Friday. All the lovely old Bettys and me. We are just getting started when in comes this woman in her twenties. She is dressed in an Olympic type swimsuit, with goggles, fins, hair cap and her own splash board. She is a professional. She is here to work out.
I should mention that up until this moment the lovely ladies around me have been yakking and having fun and not really 'working out.' Don't get me wrong, they are here to exercise, just sometimes it is a tie between their mouths and legs on which one got the harder workout! And they know it!
But all mouths stopped as this woman entered the pool. She did not enter into the "Lap" lane. She did not enter into the area that was intended for serious swimmers. She jumped right in to "Their" territory and started her laps. Full force, perfect form and much attitude was performed by this woman.
One stroke, two strokes, three strokes. All hell broke out!
"Do you see her?"
"Who does she think she is?"
"What right does she have?"
"She is in our Territory!"
"This is our space, does she not see that we are exercising here?"
"She has to go!"
I watch as these beautiful, peaceful sages start to ignite. War is brewing and if I was the twenty something woman I would be scared.
This woman just keeps swimming. The sages have hollered at her. The sages have yelled at the 19 year old life guard to do something. The sages have started to swarm.
One particular sages, who happens to be 63, and has figured out that you don't get anything in life by staying safe, decides to take things in her own hands.
First she tries talking to the woman loudly. The woman keeps swimming. Then the sage taps her on the shoulder as she swims by. The woman pauses, says "I was told I can swim here." And continues to keep swimming.
Now you must realizes that there are about 20 silver haired beauties circling, one instructor, one lifeguard, one trainer, one trainee, a father and daughter team, and me in the pool also. We are all watching this twenty year old blow this sage off.
The next thing I know, the sage has stepped forcefully in front of the swimmer, planted her feet securely, and sticks out her belly! The timing was flawless. The twenty something swimmer swam directly into the belly of this woman head first. Direct impact!
The swimmer paused. The swimmer looked around. The swimmer shook it off. The swimmer kept swimming!
Awe...pure Awe. That is all I can say. I am in awe that someone could be that disrespectful to another person. I am also totally in awe that this 63 year old sage is not totally damaged.
The 19 year old finally decides that he should step in and has to tap the swimmer twice before he can get her to stop, but he finally gets her to go to the "lap" lane.
The whole rest of the class is spent talking about the gull of the swimmer and the endurance of our sages. They inform me that this happens all the time and "they" just have to set them straight!
All I have to say is that I am glad that I am in the class and not against it!
Grandma's house
Over the River and Thru the Woods to Grandmother's House We Go!
This is my new event. I have never taken children to Grandma's House. But today I did! Today I actually drove thru the woods, and over the river, although I found out later that I was not suppose to go over the river, to Grandmother's house.
We left early in the morning, drove all day, and arrived to the friendliest greeting I've had in along time. Grandma was waiting for us on the porch. I could almost smell the chocolate chip cookies from the road!
Of course, Grandma was waiting on the porch because I let 5 year olds tell me which way to turn to get to Grandma's house and we had already called to say we were lost. This was not a wise idea, and after the dogs from a wrong turn tried to attack the car, the small children also thought it was not wise to let them navigate. But alas, one last wrong turn and we pull over to find out where we were and this man in a white truck passes us and asks if we are OK. I let him know I am just looking to find where I am going. He waves and drives off. The small children, who have steered me wrong multiple times this trip, start yelling, "Uncle Pete! Uncle Pete!" Of course the man has already driven away so I can not ask him if he is Uncle Pete. But the twins are certain that this man, in this white truck, is Uncle Pete.
"Follow him! He'll lead us to Grandma's house!" I point out to them that there are 792 million white trucks in Texas. But they don't care. This is Uncle Pete's Truck. This is Uncle Pete!
What the heck-We can't get any more lost than we already are, so I follow this strange truck with this strange Uncle Pete in it! And you know what...It was Uncle Pete! As we turned the last corner and I now recognized Uncle Pete's House and Uncle Pete's Wife I was very happy to have listened to the 5 year olds!
Needless to say, Uncle Pete gave us clear directions and we made it to Grandma's house and all is well.
We are having fun and we are getting spoiled and we are eating way to many good things that Grandma made just for us!
So I guess that it is good to go to Grandma's house even if a 5 year old is giving directions!
This is my new event. I have never taken children to Grandma's House. But today I did! Today I actually drove thru the woods, and over the river, although I found out later that I was not suppose to go over the river, to Grandmother's house.
We left early in the morning, drove all day, and arrived to the friendliest greeting I've had in along time. Grandma was waiting for us on the porch. I could almost smell the chocolate chip cookies from the road!
Of course, Grandma was waiting on the porch because I let 5 year olds tell me which way to turn to get to Grandma's house and we had already called to say we were lost. This was not a wise idea, and after the dogs from a wrong turn tried to attack the car, the small children also thought it was not wise to let them navigate. But alas, one last wrong turn and we pull over to find out where we were and this man in a white truck passes us and asks if we are OK. I let him know I am just looking to find where I am going. He waves and drives off. The small children, who have steered me wrong multiple times this trip, start yelling, "Uncle Pete! Uncle Pete!" Of course the man has already driven away so I can not ask him if he is Uncle Pete. But the twins are certain that this man, in this white truck, is Uncle Pete.
"Follow him! He'll lead us to Grandma's house!" I point out to them that there are 792 million white trucks in Texas. But they don't care. This is Uncle Pete's Truck. This is Uncle Pete!
What the heck-We can't get any more lost than we already are, so I follow this strange truck with this strange Uncle Pete in it! And you know what...It was Uncle Pete! As we turned the last corner and I now recognized Uncle Pete's House and Uncle Pete's Wife I was very happy to have listened to the 5 year olds!
Needless to say, Uncle Pete gave us clear directions and we made it to Grandma's house and all is well.
We are having fun and we are getting spoiled and we are eating way to many good things that Grandma made just for us!
So I guess that it is good to go to Grandma's house even if a 5 year old is giving directions!
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Lightning Thief
My new event for this day is finishing the kids book “Percy Jackson & Olympians the Lightning Thief.”
This is one of the kid’s books that have recently been made into a movie. I have not seen the movie but I will be interested in seeing how they transfer the book into film.
The plot of the story is a seventh grader who apparently is a son of a god. He goes on a quest to find stolen items from the Olympian gods. He must battle evil forces and monsters from Hell. In fact this seventh grader and his two friends go face to face with Hades and must deal with going to hell and surviving all of its twists and turns.
I understand that Children’s books are supposed to deal with Good and Evil. And I can even deal with a children’s book having some form of Hell in it. But this book presents the belief that all people go to Hell and then are dealt with. And this picture of Hell is scary.
I have always been a big supporter of reading books and then deciding if they are appropriate or not for kids instead for just going on hype. I, personally enjoyed Harry Potter and believe that for the right age group, and with an open opportunity for discussion, kids, Christian or otherwise, can find it very entertaining. But the right age group.
Thightning Thief is written geared to 6th thru 8th grade. Yet it’s at a 4.7 reading level. That means that a fourth grader should be able to read this and understand it. I disagree. I do not want my fourth grader reading this and I do not want my fourth grader trying to understand this. Yet I know that fourth graders and probably some third graders are reading it.
So my question is who is discussing this with our children? When I was in Oregon I ran a reading club for 9 to 14 year olds. We read everything and discussed it all. You would never realize all that goes on in our children’s heads. I really enjoyed my time with these kids. And I really enjoyed reading all of the books.
So my quest to you: read a current kid’s book and find a kid to discuss it with. See what conversations are sparked. You never know, you might even learn something!
Remember, I love you because…
This is one of the kid’s books that have recently been made into a movie. I have not seen the movie but I will be interested in seeing how they transfer the book into film.
The plot of the story is a seventh grader who apparently is a son of a god. He goes on a quest to find stolen items from the Olympian gods. He must battle evil forces and monsters from Hell. In fact this seventh grader and his two friends go face to face with Hades and must deal with going to hell and surviving all of its twists and turns.
I understand that Children’s books are supposed to deal with Good and Evil. And I can even deal with a children’s book having some form of Hell in it. But this book presents the belief that all people go to Hell and then are dealt with. And this picture of Hell is scary.
I have always been a big supporter of reading books and then deciding if they are appropriate or not for kids instead for just going on hype. I, personally enjoyed Harry Potter and believe that for the right age group, and with an open opportunity for discussion, kids, Christian or otherwise, can find it very entertaining. But the right age group.
Thightning Thief is written geared to 6th thru 8th grade. Yet it’s at a 4.7 reading level. That means that a fourth grader should be able to read this and understand it. I disagree. I do not want my fourth grader reading this and I do not want my fourth grader trying to understand this. Yet I know that fourth graders and probably some third graders are reading it.
So my question is who is discussing this with our children? When I was in Oregon I ran a reading club for 9 to 14 year olds. We read everything and discussed it all. You would never realize all that goes on in our children’s heads. I really enjoyed my time with these kids. And I really enjoyed reading all of the books.
So my quest to you: read a current kid’s book and find a kid to discuss it with. See what conversations are sparked. You never know, you might even learn something!
Remember, I love you because…
Monday, March 8, 2010
Wibit
I went to a new church yesterday. And I jumped on a Wibit! These are my two new events. The Church and the Wibit did not turn out the way I had intended, but were enjoyable none the less!
For those of you that do not know what a Wibit is-It is a giant blow up obstacle course on top of water. When I was in Minnesota I walked on water-That is frozen lake water. And now I have tried running on water. Neither one was I any good at. But I tried and all of the children under 10 thought I was hilarious! The had a blast trying to teach me how to maneuver the course, but in the end they mostly laughed at how I kept falling off of it!
So I see that no one has given me any suggestions on what I should try next. Let me know what you think-Cuz otherwise I am going to have to think outside the box and that could be dangerous!
Remeber I love you, Because...
For those of you that do not know what a Wibit is-It is a giant blow up obstacle course on top of water. When I was in Minnesota I walked on water-That is frozen lake water. And now I have tried running on water. Neither one was I any good at. But I tried and all of the children under 10 thought I was hilarious! The had a blast trying to teach me how to maneuver the course, but in the end they mostly laughed at how I kept falling off of it!
So I see that no one has given me any suggestions on what I should try next. Let me know what you think-Cuz otherwise I am going to have to think outside the box and that could be dangerous!
Remeber I love you, Because...
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Bad Musical Theater.
I went to see the musical Carousel this evening. It was at the local university. I can't say that this was the worst night of my life but it ranks right up there! I know that musicals of another era tend to be longer and more real to life than current musicals but this was long and boring.
On behalf of the Cast I must give them credit for trying very hard. The show was directed and choreographed exactly as the Broadway show.
Let me stop here and relay a story that happened last night at a concert I was at. The show was fantastic and the fans were relatively receptive. When the concert was over and we were all clapping the performers left the stage and came back again. The man in front of me turned and asked what they were doing? why weren't they leaving? He had never heard the word En cour. That is how I feel about theater in San Angelo. If they have never heard of the word En cour then they do not know to try to inspire one. I believe that the planning comity for the University had a great idea to bring about something new and interesting to the community. I just feel that the follow thru was lacking.
So my new today was the musical, but my new that I look forward to achieving is giving the theater another chance and seeing what New things they will be coming up with.
Remember, I love you, because...
On behalf of the Cast I must give them credit for trying very hard. The show was directed and choreographed exactly as the Broadway show.
Let me stop here and relay a story that happened last night at a concert I was at. The show was fantastic and the fans were relatively receptive. When the concert was over and we were all clapping the performers left the stage and came back again. The man in front of me turned and asked what they were doing? why weren't they leaving? He had never heard the word En cour. That is how I feel about theater in San Angelo. If they have never heard of the word En cour then they do not know to try to inspire one. I believe that the planning comity for the University had a great idea to bring about something new and interesting to the community. I just feel that the follow thru was lacking.
So my new today was the musical, but my new that I look forward to achieving is giving the theater another chance and seeing what New things they will be coming up with.
Remember, I love you, because...
Guinness World Record
While the world was sleeping, I was making a list of all the “New” things I could try between now and November 6, 2010. I came up with a bunch of crazy things-Sky Diving, get swallowed by a whale…Or the simple things like try a new shampoo or eat something different. I started this list because it dawned on me that I am going to have to actually put some effort into this if I am going to do something new each day.
I learn something new each day, but that is not the content of this blog!!!
I started asking some of my friends for ideas and I got answers that ranged from “watch a James Bond Movie,” to “trek through Tibet.” Both are still an option. Although I have done one already! It’s up to you to decide which one!
As I was listening to the radio yesterday I heard that some crazy people are trying to set the worlds record for the most people wearing a Snuggie at the same time! Again, I ask who thinks up this stuff!!! And they did it. They got the Guinness World record people there and had a stadium full of Snuggie wearing people. That is crazy-But no crazier than anything I could come up with.
So, here is my quest…Set a World Record. Sometime between now and November 6th, I will be attempting to set a record. If you have any ideas of what I should do please give me your insight. Of course this is a limited time opportunity unsolicited insight will be frowned on again soon! :-)
Hope to hear from ya-
Remember I love you, because…
I learn something new each day, but that is not the content of this blog!!!
I started asking some of my friends for ideas and I got answers that ranged from “watch a James Bond Movie,” to “trek through Tibet.” Both are still an option. Although I have done one already! It’s up to you to decide which one!
As I was listening to the radio yesterday I heard that some crazy people are trying to set the worlds record for the most people wearing a Snuggie at the same time! Again, I ask who thinks up this stuff!!! And they did it. They got the Guinness World record people there and had a stadium full of Snuggie wearing people. That is crazy-But no crazier than anything I could come up with.
So, here is my quest…Set a World Record. Sometime between now and November 6th, I will be attempting to set a record. If you have any ideas of what I should do please give me your insight. Of course this is a limited time opportunity unsolicited insight will be frowned on again soon! :-)
Hope to hear from ya-
Remember I love you, because…
Friday, March 5, 2010
What you can lean from the seasoned members of society...
Today I went to the Silver Sneakers Swimming Aerobics class. Try saying that 3 times fast! It was a blast. All these little old ladies talking about grandkids and recipes and life. This class only meets on Friday mornings and some of these women have been coming here before they even had grandchildren. And I’ve heard all about it, some of these women now even have great grandchildren!
One of the gray haired beauties had apparently been sick, so it had been a few weeks since she had been here. So she needed to be welcomed back to the fold and filled in on all that she had missed. I love these women. They are beautiful inside and out. They talk about all the good that they are doing in the world and they give advise on how to help others overcome difficult situations. It really is beautiful. And all this is done while wearing a bathing suit and swirling around in a pool kicking my butt with how graceful and proficient their movements are. These women rock when it comes to exercising in the water!
So I carry on with them and finish the workout and head to the locker room. Now, I must say, I am not shy when it comes to my body. I’m fat, I'm a girl, and I never got the whole being naked is suppose to make people suddenly see your body in a different light. Like I said earlier, with or without my clothes on I’m still fat, still a girl and still me!
I have learned from my not so skin comfy friends that my comfort sometimes makes people uncomfortable. So I don’t go around flaunting my naked body at everyone. (Ok, not all the time.) I do have some reserve bones in my body and I was using them with these women. WRONG thing to do. These women decided that I was not comfortable with my body so they decided to initiate me. Or at least that is what it felt like to me.
So, about 6, 65-year-old women are standing buck naked in front of me carrying on a conversation. Telling me that we all have the same stuff so no need to worry. I promise, I could not make this stuff up!!!! So we all get changed. As the pack finishes getting ready the really talkative “Betty” tells me about her first time in a YMCA locker room.
She was much younger, as she relayed it. She had gone to stay with her Aunt for the summer. Her Aunt told her to bring her swimsuit since they could do water aerobics at the Y. She said all the ladies in the class were about 90 years old. And when they were all done and changing in the locker room they all walked around like there was no big deal. She asked her Aunt if this is what she would have to look forward to when she got older. Her Aunt assured her yes.
Having been an inquisitive creature her whole life, the women in front of me informed me that she asked her Aunt why none of the old ladies had any pubic hair! (If you’re already saying “TMI” it gets worse!) This little old lady is now standing face forward in front of me wearing only her bra and Panties. “My Aunt asked me if there was grass in a playground? That area is a playground, so no grass grows there!”
What do you say after that????? I just smiled and nodded. She continued to say, “It really is a playground, you know?”
So today’s “New” experience is just that! A totally New Experience!
Let me just say that Granny Panties have a whole new meaning for me now!
Remember, I love you because…
One of the gray haired beauties had apparently been sick, so it had been a few weeks since she had been here. So she needed to be welcomed back to the fold and filled in on all that she had missed. I love these women. They are beautiful inside and out. They talk about all the good that they are doing in the world and they give advise on how to help others overcome difficult situations. It really is beautiful. And all this is done while wearing a bathing suit and swirling around in a pool kicking my butt with how graceful and proficient their movements are. These women rock when it comes to exercising in the water!
So I carry on with them and finish the workout and head to the locker room. Now, I must say, I am not shy when it comes to my body. I’m fat, I'm a girl, and I never got the whole being naked is suppose to make people suddenly see your body in a different light. Like I said earlier, with or without my clothes on I’m still fat, still a girl and still me!
I have learned from my not so skin comfy friends that my comfort sometimes makes people uncomfortable. So I don’t go around flaunting my naked body at everyone. (Ok, not all the time.) I do have some reserve bones in my body and I was using them with these women. WRONG thing to do. These women decided that I was not comfortable with my body so they decided to initiate me. Or at least that is what it felt like to me.
So, about 6, 65-year-old women are standing buck naked in front of me carrying on a conversation. Telling me that we all have the same stuff so no need to worry. I promise, I could not make this stuff up!!!! So we all get changed. As the pack finishes getting ready the really talkative “Betty” tells me about her first time in a YMCA locker room.
She was much younger, as she relayed it. She had gone to stay with her Aunt for the summer. Her Aunt told her to bring her swimsuit since they could do water aerobics at the Y. She said all the ladies in the class were about 90 years old. And when they were all done and changing in the locker room they all walked around like there was no big deal. She asked her Aunt if this is what she would have to look forward to when she got older. Her Aunt assured her yes.
Having been an inquisitive creature her whole life, the women in front of me informed me that she asked her Aunt why none of the old ladies had any pubic hair! (If you’re already saying “TMI” it gets worse!) This little old lady is now standing face forward in front of me wearing only her bra and Panties. “My Aunt asked me if there was grass in a playground? That area is a playground, so no grass grows there!”
What do you say after that????? I just smiled and nodded. She continued to say, “It really is a playground, you know?”
So today’s “New” experience is just that! A totally New Experience!
Let me just say that Granny Panties have a whole new meaning for me now!
Remember, I love you because…
Look over there...
Yesterday I had my “welcome to the gym” orientation. My trainers name is Dennis. He is a wonderful guy. Fit and yet not scary. Helpful and yet not pushy. He is a good fit.
So I walk into the gym. I see the enormous treadmills and the stationary bikes and all the other equipment that are suppose to become good friends of mine. And yet I am not drawn to them. I see the nice shiny machines on the side of the gym. They have gears sticking out of them. They have slidey feet thingies and they have only tone fit beautiful people at them! I want that! I want to only use the machines that all the pretty people use!
But Dennis is doing his sales pitch and showing me how to incorporate all of these new activities into my daily life and mentioning something or other about food and muscle and water. I am listening, I really am. But the shiny machine keeps calling my name. I am sure that all the rest of the things that he is showing me are great, but I want shiny happy machine.
Again, I stick with Dennis and listen to him tell me that Cardio is my friend and that my new friend and me should really spend time together daily! It’s ok if we need to take a break once in awhile. But remember to at least talk on the phone! (Which for all of you that don’t live in my head, that means take the stairs whenever possible and park far away so that you get extra steps!)
So we start at the bike. It is one of those with a recliner attached to it. At least that is what Dennis is trying to sell me. When your butt is a size 26 no little black piece of metal covered with cows skin is going to compare to my comfy oversized totally stuffed lounger. And to make matters worse, I now have to sit on this black triangle and bring my legs up to my chin and avoid smacking my stomach as I extend. Sure, the reclining seat is really making a difference! But I charge on. I go a mile, in 10 minutes by the way! (Oohhs and aahhs inserted here!)
Since Dennis has informed me that this orientation is just that an orientation and now a full on workout…I am ready to move on. Shiny happy machine here I come. Yet Dennis leads me to the treadmill. I breathe in and walk to the treadmill. It’s got buttons and lights so it’s still shiny so I am happy. We talk, We walk, and he makes a suggestion that I see how long it takes to walk a mile. Did I mention that Dennis is Evil! Nice, but Evil. But I agree and see where this leads me. Of course the whole time I am still looking at the shiny people! Before I know it I have gone a mile. 20.4 minutes has passed, I have burned 79.6 calories and I walked my mile. (Ok, all you skinny people that just said a 20-minute mile totally sucks-SUCK! But remember I still love you. In fact I love you because you suck!)
I feel good about my 20-minute mile. I did it and that was all that matters.
I have now decided that it is time for the shiny happy machine. And I tell Dennis! He smiles. Remember I did say he is Evil! He goes back to explaining the 3 parts of the gym and how each has their own place and time and difficulty. And then puts it in plan terms. The bike was about a 2 in the difficulty scale. And I succeeded. The Treadmill was about a 5 in the difficulty scale and I succeeded. The nice happy shiny machine is about a 792 in the difficulty scale. He describes all the pros and cons of the machine and tells me the good qualities of the machine and blah, blah, blah. And then points out this extremely fit, beautiful girl jumping rope in the “free weight” area. And says that she is a runner and does XYZ and uses that machine. But had to work up to it. Therefore, I am suppose to deduce that I must work up to that. :-( I do not do things gradually! I jump and then check to see that there is still land under me. Why would you have to work up to the happy shiny machine! Why! But I take one last look and realize that Dennis is right and that I must be happy with my treadmill and bike work for the day! But I will be back-you shiny happy apparently annoyingly hard machine! You have not seen the last of me!
As I journey on my adventure I believe that today’s lesson is a good one. And it reminds me of the Bible verse Ecclesiastes 3:1-3. There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build.
I have to say that mostly my “new” experience was Not getting on the machine that I wasn’t ready for, but I did try a machine that I’ve never seen before so that is my “new” for the day. The machine sounds something like AP-blah, but it is not a news source or writing manual so I do not know exactly what the name is. But it was a 7 on the difficulty scale, so there! I was only on it for about 7 seconds, but I tried it!
Remember I love you because…
So I walk into the gym. I see the enormous treadmills and the stationary bikes and all the other equipment that are suppose to become good friends of mine. And yet I am not drawn to them. I see the nice shiny machines on the side of the gym. They have gears sticking out of them. They have slidey feet thingies and they have only tone fit beautiful people at them! I want that! I want to only use the machines that all the pretty people use!
But Dennis is doing his sales pitch and showing me how to incorporate all of these new activities into my daily life and mentioning something or other about food and muscle and water. I am listening, I really am. But the shiny machine keeps calling my name. I am sure that all the rest of the things that he is showing me are great, but I want shiny happy machine.
Again, I stick with Dennis and listen to him tell me that Cardio is my friend and that my new friend and me should really spend time together daily! It’s ok if we need to take a break once in awhile. But remember to at least talk on the phone! (Which for all of you that don’t live in my head, that means take the stairs whenever possible and park far away so that you get extra steps!)
So we start at the bike. It is one of those with a recliner attached to it. At least that is what Dennis is trying to sell me. When your butt is a size 26 no little black piece of metal covered with cows skin is going to compare to my comfy oversized totally stuffed lounger. And to make matters worse, I now have to sit on this black triangle and bring my legs up to my chin and avoid smacking my stomach as I extend. Sure, the reclining seat is really making a difference! But I charge on. I go a mile, in 10 minutes by the way! (Oohhs and aahhs inserted here!)
Since Dennis has informed me that this orientation is just that an orientation and now a full on workout…I am ready to move on. Shiny happy machine here I come. Yet Dennis leads me to the treadmill. I breathe in and walk to the treadmill. It’s got buttons and lights so it’s still shiny so I am happy. We talk, We walk, and he makes a suggestion that I see how long it takes to walk a mile. Did I mention that Dennis is Evil! Nice, but Evil. But I agree and see where this leads me. Of course the whole time I am still looking at the shiny people! Before I know it I have gone a mile. 20.4 minutes has passed, I have burned 79.6 calories and I walked my mile. (Ok, all you skinny people that just said a 20-minute mile totally sucks-SUCK! But remember I still love you. In fact I love you because you suck!)
I feel good about my 20-minute mile. I did it and that was all that matters.
I have now decided that it is time for the shiny happy machine. And I tell Dennis! He smiles. Remember I did say he is Evil! He goes back to explaining the 3 parts of the gym and how each has their own place and time and difficulty. And then puts it in plan terms. The bike was about a 2 in the difficulty scale. And I succeeded. The Treadmill was about a 5 in the difficulty scale and I succeeded. The nice happy shiny machine is about a 792 in the difficulty scale. He describes all the pros and cons of the machine and tells me the good qualities of the machine and blah, blah, blah. And then points out this extremely fit, beautiful girl jumping rope in the “free weight” area. And says that she is a runner and does XYZ and uses that machine. But had to work up to it. Therefore, I am suppose to deduce that I must work up to that. :-( I do not do things gradually! I jump and then check to see that there is still land under me. Why would you have to work up to the happy shiny machine! Why! But I take one last look and realize that Dennis is right and that I must be happy with my treadmill and bike work for the day! But I will be back-you shiny happy apparently annoyingly hard machine! You have not seen the last of me!
As I journey on my adventure I believe that today’s lesson is a good one. And it reminds me of the Bible verse Ecclesiastes 3:1-3. There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build.
I have to say that mostly my “new” experience was Not getting on the machine that I wasn’t ready for, but I did try a machine that I’ve never seen before so that is my “new” for the day. The machine sounds something like AP-blah, but it is not a news source or writing manual so I do not know exactly what the name is. But it was a 7 on the difficulty scale, so there! I was only on it for about 7 seconds, but I tried it!
Remember I love you because…
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Plant a tree...
As I was discussing my new Birthday Adventure with my Life Coach this morning I decided today’s new experience is planting a tree. I have never planted a tree and this seems like a great time to change that. One of the subjects that my coach and I discussed was the fact that life happens progressively. It is not the kind of experience that happens to you and then is over with. This is a journey. When we started talking about my goals and plans it was pointed out that I did not gain all of my weight over night, therefore I will not lose it over night. That also goes for my fears, my misunderstandings, my grief’s and my goals. They did not happen over night and they will not be manifested over night. So that got me thinking about seeds. That life really is about planting seeds and watching them grow. So I figured the act of planting a tree and watching it grow could be a reminder of life’s journey.
So I purchased the tree. The fact that you can hand someone $30 and drive away with a real live tree is still amazing to me. It’s like buying a miracle. So I gently drive my tree home at 65 miles per hour. And I begin digging the hole. Let me just start by saying digging a hole big enough to fit a 6 ft baby tree is harder than you think. Especially in West Texas soil! So I dig about 6 inches down and I hit Rock! Which are really large blocks of solid concrete. But I continue to dig. I continue to break up the dirt. And I continue to deepen the hole. I am also now working up a sweat. I finally get it to a reasonable depth. I shake the pot off around my new tree and then work it down into my new hole. It fits! Halleluiah! I pack it back in and I now have a tree, where there never was a tree. It’s a beautiful form of art, of creativity.
After this fine form of bonding with nature I head to the gym to do water aerobics. Now, I know that so many of you have an image of water aerobics. Cute petite scantily clad women jumping up and down looking so much like Ester Williams that you would consider joining. This is not the class I am attending. There is not a woman under 200 lbs in the group. And our instructor is Richard Simmons with baggy breast in a one piece and a voice weighted down by years of smoking. You get the most annoyingly peepy cheerleader type who is really lucky to have found her calling at such a young age of 53. But I must bless her-because my bum and arms are totally soar, so she must have done something right. I think in the long run she will be a great addition to my birthday tour. Class was absolutely amazing. Have you ever realized that when everyone else shares the same fears that you fear, we all seem a little less afraid? That is there is not an ounce of uncomfortably about being in a bathing suit. We are all in bathing suits. We are all not the typical beauties, and yet these women that I met today are strong, confident, beautiful women. They are just working on seeing those qualities for themselves. All of these women were very helpful for me and were very pleasant company. At the end everyone checked to see that I would be coming back. So I guess that I am part of the team!
As I sit here and look at my tree I am still in awe of its life. It is a baby, yet it is over 6 ft tall. It is less than 2 inches wide and yet it will grow to about 4 feet wide. I look at this as the perfect daily motivator. As the tree gets fatter, and I get skinner, we are both getting stronger.
Bye for now and Remember I love you-because
So I purchased the tree. The fact that you can hand someone $30 and drive away with a real live tree is still amazing to me. It’s like buying a miracle. So I gently drive my tree home at 65 miles per hour. And I begin digging the hole. Let me just start by saying digging a hole big enough to fit a 6 ft baby tree is harder than you think. Especially in West Texas soil! So I dig about 6 inches down and I hit Rock! Which are really large blocks of solid concrete. But I continue to dig. I continue to break up the dirt. And I continue to deepen the hole. I am also now working up a sweat. I finally get it to a reasonable depth. I shake the pot off around my new tree and then work it down into my new hole. It fits! Halleluiah! I pack it back in and I now have a tree, where there never was a tree. It’s a beautiful form of art, of creativity.
After this fine form of bonding with nature I head to the gym to do water aerobics. Now, I know that so many of you have an image of water aerobics. Cute petite scantily clad women jumping up and down looking so much like Ester Williams that you would consider joining. This is not the class I am attending. There is not a woman under 200 lbs in the group. And our instructor is Richard Simmons with baggy breast in a one piece and a voice weighted down by years of smoking. You get the most annoyingly peepy cheerleader type who is really lucky to have found her calling at such a young age of 53. But I must bless her-because my bum and arms are totally soar, so she must have done something right. I think in the long run she will be a great addition to my birthday tour. Class was absolutely amazing. Have you ever realized that when everyone else shares the same fears that you fear, we all seem a little less afraid? That is there is not an ounce of uncomfortably about being in a bathing suit. We are all in bathing suits. We are all not the typical beauties, and yet these women that I met today are strong, confident, beautiful women. They are just working on seeing those qualities for themselves. All of these women were very helpful for me and were very pleasant company. At the end everyone checked to see that I would be coming back. So I guess that I am part of the team!
As I sit here and look at my tree I am still in awe of its life. It is a baby, yet it is over 6 ft tall. It is less than 2 inches wide and yet it will grow to about 4 feet wide. I look at this as the perfect daily motivator. As the tree gets fatter, and I get skinner, we are both getting stronger.
Bye for now and Remember I love you-because
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
The "First" of many First.
My Sister-in-law turned 50 last week and we celebrated her birth this last weekend.
A tradition that she has created in our family is that on your birthday you do something you've never done.
With that in mine I am starting this blog. This November I turn 40! End of Blog!
No really. I have decided that my something new will be a daily occurrence-Starting now. So yes, this Blog is today's new experience for the day. I am surrounded by creative friends. They write, sing, dance, act, and cross the line at every opportunity. And they all have Blogs. So, I have to do one too. OK, I know it's going thru your head..."if all your friends jumped off a bridge, would you?" Hell yes! With bells on! So here is my jump. Here is my leap. I plan on blogging about the person I wish to become this next year. 40! That's old! Hey, it's the oldest I've ever almost been, so it's old for me! I know that 40 is the new 30 and that supposedly life begins after 40-but I am in no condition to begin anything as a 30 year old! So I did "what everyone else does" I joined a gym and went shopping and bought more fruit and veggies than one person could possibly consume in one week! But on the bright side, my pee will smell sweet and my poop will be funny colors!
I should probably stop here and explain my life philosophy.
You can't hide anything! So why try!
I am 278 pounds with or without my clothes on. I have awful teeth-smiling or not smiling. I have way more thoughts than the average person-if I share them or if I keep them to myself! So I chose to share. Oh, and I can't spell and have an absolutely horrid comprehension of the English language. But I can make you laugh! Blunt is my friend, or at least my alter ego! So be prepared for shock.
Let me share a story from my Sophomore year of college:
It was my 18th birthday. My best friend went through my address book and invited everyone. And being the person that I am, people came! Oh, I forgot to mention that this was a surprise birthday party. So I arrive for dinner and his families house is full of friends. In the kitchen are my church women friends. In the dinning room are my Sorority friends. In the back right corner of the living room are my high school friends. In the left back corner of the living room are my drama friends. In the front right corner of the living room are my Young Republican friends and then to complete the circle, in the front left corner of the living room are my Gay and Lesbian Center friends!!! This party was the reason America's funniest home videos was created!
I had a blast! I got two marriage proposals, danced my ass off, and received a very nice Laura Ashley dress that I wore to the Goth club the following night! I can not say that everyone else shares my memory. There were very many uncomfortable people, there were many shocked people and the night even ended in a fight with the cops being called and the front door being broken off the hinges! And yet, I love them all. Everyone of those friends were there because I love them. I hope my 40th lives up to that potential!
That being said, I go back to "I love you Because." I am currently listening to a musical by that title. It is beautiful. And the easiest way to describe my life philosophy. I love you because. We are all opinionated and we all think we know best and we all have 792 quirks that make us us. And so many people say I love you anyways. I say NO! I love you because! We are all lovable. We all have things that make us us. We all have reasons that make us believe what we believe. We all have actions that make us us. We all have self.
I leave you with my favorite line from the musical:
I love you because you are not the person I dreamed of at all!
A tradition that she has created in our family is that on your birthday you do something you've never done.
With that in mine I am starting this blog. This November I turn 40! End of Blog!
No really. I have decided that my something new will be a daily occurrence-Starting now. So yes, this Blog is today's new experience for the day. I am surrounded by creative friends. They write, sing, dance, act, and cross the line at every opportunity. And they all have Blogs. So, I have to do one too. OK, I know it's going thru your head..."if all your friends jumped off a bridge, would you?" Hell yes! With bells on! So here is my jump. Here is my leap. I plan on blogging about the person I wish to become this next year. 40! That's old! Hey, it's the oldest I've ever almost been, so it's old for me! I know that 40 is the new 30 and that supposedly life begins after 40-but I am in no condition to begin anything as a 30 year old! So I did "what everyone else does" I joined a gym and went shopping and bought more fruit and veggies than one person could possibly consume in one week! But on the bright side, my pee will smell sweet and my poop will be funny colors!
I should probably stop here and explain my life philosophy.
You can't hide anything! So why try!
I am 278 pounds with or without my clothes on. I have awful teeth-smiling or not smiling. I have way more thoughts than the average person-if I share them or if I keep them to myself! So I chose to share. Oh, and I can't spell and have an absolutely horrid comprehension of the English language. But I can make you laugh! Blunt is my friend, or at least my alter ego! So be prepared for shock.
Let me share a story from my Sophomore year of college:
It was my 18th birthday. My best friend went through my address book and invited everyone. And being the person that I am, people came! Oh, I forgot to mention that this was a surprise birthday party. So I arrive for dinner and his families house is full of friends. In the kitchen are my church women friends. In the dinning room are my Sorority friends. In the back right corner of the living room are my high school friends. In the left back corner of the living room are my drama friends. In the front right corner of the living room are my Young Republican friends and then to complete the circle, in the front left corner of the living room are my Gay and Lesbian Center friends!!! This party was the reason America's funniest home videos was created!
I had a blast! I got two marriage proposals, danced my ass off, and received a very nice Laura Ashley dress that I wore to the Goth club the following night! I can not say that everyone else shares my memory. There were very many uncomfortable people, there were many shocked people and the night even ended in a fight with the cops being called and the front door being broken off the hinges! And yet, I love them all. Everyone of those friends were there because I love them. I hope my 40th lives up to that potential!
That being said, I go back to "I love you Because." I am currently listening to a musical by that title. It is beautiful. And the easiest way to describe my life philosophy. I love you because. We are all opinionated and we all think we know best and we all have 792 quirks that make us us. And so many people say I love you anyways. I say NO! I love you because! We are all lovable. We all have things that make us us. We all have reasons that make us believe what we believe. We all have actions that make us us. We all have self.
I leave you with my favorite line from the musical:
I love you because you are not the person I dreamed of at all!
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